Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Getting All Worked Up ... Over Yard Signs



This article was originally written in the spring of 2008, just as the presidential primaries were heating up. This article, in print in today’s Cincinnati Enquirer, prompted me to post it. (For some reason, the article seems to be available online only at NKY.com.)
____________________________________________________

I had an interesting conversation with a friend the other day. I think most people would categorize it as an argument.

*Jane* lives down the street from me, on the same cul-de-sac, in a 65-house subdivision within the 275 loop.

Jane shared with me that she and another neighbor had recently had a conversation in which they agreed that they hoped this year the no-political-signs rule would be enforced, because all those signs make the neighborhood look “cluttered and trashy.”

Sigh.

Needless to say, this is a subject on which Jane and I do not share a common opinion.

Yes, I knew there were so-called “protective” covenants when I moved here. And I expressed my concerns to my husband. I believe I said “I hope no one tries to tell me what color I can or cannot paint my front door, ‘cause baby, that ain’t gonna fly.”

What I didn’t know was that I was moving into Stepford.

Proponents of Homeowners Associations (HOAs) say they exist to protect and even increase the property values of all residents. On an intellectual level I sort of get that. But in practice many of the rules seem rather petty. Some seem overly intrusive or invasive. And some seem like they should be illegal.

I should have been able to foresee the unhappiness I, a dyed-in-the-wool, independent-minded, life-long New Yorker, would face living somewhere where the few people who attend the annual HOA meeting work really hard to get a by-law passed that would require all homeowners to purchase identical $400 mailboxes.

I did a little research to see what other people have to say about their associations. Some people love them. Little wonder, others hate them.

Some association covenants forbid satellite TV dishes. Some forbid birdfeeders.

One family I read about was contacted by their HOA and told that their dog’s crate (kept in their house) was not an “approved” crate. If they didn’t get an approved crate, they would be fined $50 each time someone from the HOA saw the crate? So how did the HOA learn of the nonconformance? The family’s neighbors explained that HOA members routinely walk the neighborhood looking into people’s windows.

My friend Marj’s HOA requires that she bring the morning paper (yes, she goes old school, reading her news in print form) in no later than 8 a.m. or face a fine. Always the contrarian, she fought back, albeit in a rather passive-aggressive manner: Marj collected a week’s worth of papers and hung them from the tree in her front yard, fine-be-damned.

And then there are the ever popular anti-clothesline rules, seemingly some of the most common rules out there in association-land.

Last year in my neighborhood, the children of one family planted a few (maybe five?)
stalks of corn in the front yard. I must have walked my dog past that yard 100 times that summer. I thought the corn was cool. So did Tracy, my friend who lived directly across the street from the supposed eyesore. Come time for the annual meeting however and the corn was all the buzz.

One woman, so incensed by such a tacky sight, cited the following rule: “No fence or wall of any kind, specifically including the use of hedge or other growing plants as a fence, shall be erected.”

A fence? Really? Maybe if something else was getting erected at home, she wouldn’t be such a petty bitch.

To this day I find it incredible that someone could get so worked up over … corn.

In another part of the country and during that region’s drought, one village restricted lawn watering. Violators could face a $250 fine issued by the local police department. But residents who abided by the law were issued fines of $100 by their HOA because the lawns were turning an unsightly yellow color. And therefore, I guess, lowering property taxes …

Another “green” issue arose in Scarsdale, NY when a neighborhood group attempted to block the installation of solar panels on a home. The group argued the panels “would clearly be an eyesore in our lovely neighborhood.” The owners won the right to install the panels after they went to court to fight the foolishness.

One home in Virginia had really nice landscaping, so nice it won a citywide home beautification award. A nice plaque touting the accomplishment was given to the winner to display in the yard for 30 days. The homeowners association found a rule that no signs were permitted in the yards except real estate signs. The homeowner was forced to remove the plaque.

Which brings me back to my political-sign discourse. This is what my covenants state: “No sign of any kind shall be displayed to the public view on any lot except one professional sign … advertising the property for sale or rent.”

I yelled at Jane, or so she recalls, arguing that such a rule is unequivocally
illegal. I don’t care about the rules, because the First Amendment, the No. 1 rule in the United States, obviously supersedes our neighborhood rules, I ranted. There have been several lawsuits throughout the country concerning this very issue, one right in Mariemont as a matter of fact, and my right to express myself politically through an 18 inch-by-12 inch sign will win out.

I felt very smug knowing my first amendment law so well.

But then I researched online – I wanted to have all my ducks in a row should I need to wage battle to ensure the freedom to post signs in my yard. And I found out, through firstamendmentcenter.org that the First Amendment “generally protects people only from government interference with speech.”

Apparently, I really did forfeit my rights when I signed on the dotted line.

After thinking long and hard, I cannot fathom that Americans would begrudge their fellow countrymen the right to post a political yard sign. I don’t think it will be enforced in my neighborhood. I’m hoping it won’t be enforced.

And if it is enforced, sure, I’ll push back – it’s in my blood; I can’t help myself.

But first I appeal to everyone out there: Do you really want to be the king of people, the kind of society that would willingly and wantonly prohibit the exercise of free speech, that tenet that out democracy is based upon?

Whatever your reasoning, please think before you answer. You never know when you might need to take a stand.

*Jane is a pseudonym meant to protect me from my friend’s wrath should she stumble upon this article.

1 comment: